Summer is starting to wind down, school has started again, and I can already feel life getting busier.
It is still very much summer here, but fall is coming. Before long, there will be pumpkin patches, farm visits, Halloween decorating, hiking, school projects, Thanksgiving, and then Christmas right behind it.
I love this time of year. I look forward to the traditions, the outings, the cooler weather, and the way the house starts to change with the season.
But I also know how quickly all of those good things can become too much.
Once school starts, the slower pace of summer disappears pretty quickly. The calendar fills up, there is always something to remember, and it can start to feel like one thing rolls right into the next until January.
This year, I have also decided to move Sage & Linen into four posts a week.
Picking Sage & Linen back up after leaving it for a while has been exciting, but it has also made me anxious. I care about it, I want to do it well, and I know how easy it is for me to overdo things when I am excited about them.
Four posts a week means more writing, more photos, more editing, and more planning. That is all work I enjoy, but it is still more to keep up with. And Sage & Linen is only one part of my life.
There is school, family plans, errands, appointments, projects around the house, and all of the normal things that keep life moving. Then fall and the holidays arrive, and suddenly there are even more things we want to do and more things we feel like we should do.
We want to enjoy fall. We want to make the holidays feel special. But there are only so many hours in a day, and when everything starts piling up at once, even the things we were looking forward to can begin to feel like one more thing that needs to get done.
That is usually where the stress and frustration start for me.
I do not want to get halfway through fall and realize I have made everything harder than it needed to be. I also do not want to reach January feeling like I spent the last four months running behind my own life.
So I am trying to think ahead now. Not because I have this figured out, but because I can already feel myself worrying about how I am going to manage it all.
Trying to Get Ahead of It
The first thing I am doing is looking at the next few months as a whole instead of dealing with everything one week at a time.
I want one place where I can see school dates, family plans, appointments, blog deadlines, seasonal outings, and anything else already coming up. Not because I want every minute scheduled. Honestly, that would probably make me more anxious in a completely different way. I just want to be able to see the busy weeks before I am already in them.
I am also trying to put things on the calendar as soon as they come up. When something is written down and settled right away, I do not have to keep carrying it around in my head or worrying that I am forgetting something.
I use Google Calendar, and I am getting better about setting reminders and alarms for the things I know I will need help remembering. I may still forget why I walked into a room, but at least my phone can tell me when the school event starts.
I know how easy it is for me to look at an open weekend and think I can fit in a farm visit, a decorating project, photos for the blog, errands, and whatever else sounds good at the time. Then the weekend arrives, and I am frustrated because I have created a list no normal person could finish.
So I am trying to be more realistic about what will actually fit.
That may mean moving a project to another week, choosing one outing instead of trying to do everything, or accepting that some things can wait. I do not want to take all of the fun out of the season by turning every weekend into another list of things I need to accomplish.
Learning to Say No
The other thing I am really trying to learn is how to say no.
Or maybe not always no. Sometimes it is simply, “Not this time.”
That is hard for me. I do not like disappointing people, and I can convince myself that saying no to one request somehow makes me a bad person. But realistically, I cannot say yes to everything and then be surprised when I feel stressed and frustrated.
I am trying to remember that saying no does not mean I do not care. It does not mean everyone is going to be upset with me, and no, everybody is not going to hate me because I could not do one thing.
Most of the time, people understand. And even when someone is disappointed, that does not automatically mean I made the wrong choice.
Sometimes saying no to one thing is the only way I can protect the things I have already said yes to, including my family, my work, and my own well-being.
I think a lot of women struggle with this. We want to help. We want to show up. We want to be dependable. But there comes a point when saying yes to everything means we are not really present for any of it.
I am trying to stop treating every request like an obligation and give myself permission to decide what actually fits.
Making Time for Myself Too
This is probably the part I am most likely to let slide, which is exactly why I need to plan for it.
I want to start scheduling time for myself the same way I would schedule an appointment, a school event, or anything else that matters.
That might mean reading for an hour, listening to an audiobook, working on a puzzle, watching a movie, taking a walk, or doing whatever brings a little joy and helps me feel like myself again.
I am not especially good at protecting that time. If something else comes up, it is usually the first thing I give away. And if I wait until everything is finished and everyone else needs nothing from me, that time is never going to happen, because I will literally be asleep! By then it is usually late, and I will sit down to watch a movie or do something for myself and fall asleep almost immediately.
I know I am not alone in that.
For so many women and parents, personal time becomes whatever is left at the bottom of the calendar after everything more important has been handled. Most weeks, there is nothing left.
So I am trying to put it on the calendar on purpose. Not because relaxing needs to become another task to complete, but because I know I need things in my life that are not about being productive or taking care of someone else.
I also want to leave some open space in the week. Someone may get sick. A school project may appear with very little warning. Something may take longer than I expected. Or I may simply be tired.
I am trying to accept that open time is not wasted time. It is what gives me room to adjust when real life happens.
And when a week becomes too much, I want to have a backup plan instead of waiting until I am already overwhelmed.
A blog post can be shorter. Social media can be lighter. Dinner can be easy. A project can move. Decorations do not have to go up all at once. Using the simpler plan does not mean I failed. It means I noticed that something needed to change.
Keeping the Good Parts Good
More than anything, I do not want the things I love about fall and the holidays to become things I drag myself through because they were written on a seasonal list.
I want to enjoy the pumpkin patch. I want to go to the farm, decorate for Halloween, hike when the weather cools down, and spend time with my family without mentally running through everything I still need to do.
That may mean doing less.
It may mean taking fewer photos, leaving some moments undocumented, choosing one outing instead of three, or letting something be simple.
I am trying to remember that the season does not have to be perfect for it to be meaningful.
I know the next few months will still be busy, and I know there will be weeks when the plan does not go the way I hoped. I will probably overcommit at least once. Something will take longer than expected. December will still be December.
But I also think a little preparation can make a difference.
I may not be able to remove all of the stress, but I can make better choices before I am already overwhelmed. I can write things down instead of trying to remember everything. I can say no, or not this time. I can leave room in the calendar, simplify when I need to, and make time for the things that help me feel like myself.
I am still figuring this out, but I feel better knowing I am not just waiting for the busy season to hit me.
I am trying to meet it with a little more intention this year.
